The Helpers - An Ode to the Peripheral Movers of Mountains.

Once upon a time, there was a mythical archetype called the helpers.  They were not of any one species, yet could be anyone or anything.  Sometimes, the helpers were unwilling accomplices, the victims of odd symbiotic relationships such as zombie ants simply a shell for another being.  On other occasions, human beings opening the door for someone laden with goods, children or a walking frame.

In my forties, I have learnt to look for the helpers.  Being aware of their existence occasionally makes life bearable.  Sometimes, I hope I fulfil the role.  But how can we assess whether we have successfully helped someone?  Can it be ascertained in a smile or a thank you or is it a more profound feeling that grows through reflection?

There have been numerous events in my past where I have learnt that sometimes the act of support is not required or else seems to be at the wrong time.  Depending upon how fatalistic I feel, it can make me believe in a natural order or some kind of divine or cosmic intervention in the world we inhabit. I remember one incident which highlighted that help is not always wanted.  The beetle I once removed from the side of the pond despite its texture, which was surprisingly hard yet also pliable, I guess like tectonic plates.  I probably deceive myself as the movement was simply the wild gesticulations of legs as the beetle experienced an unusual flight onto the grass away from the water of the pond.  Ironically, it returned to the same position in the pond over time, so in many respects, I had hindered its journey.  Its possibly suicidal mission was delayed by my 'altruistic kindness'.

On several other occasions, I have also experienced where helping people is not always respected or wanted.  Working in retail at one point in my career, I initially used to ask everyone who came into the shop after about five minutes of browsing whether they needed my help e.g. 'is there anything that you are looking for' or 'how can I help you?'  I watched my inflection as most repeated statements run the risk of being misinterpreted as glib or patronising, just as 'have a nice day' can be taken as almost a gesture of war if the recipient of the statement is experiencing a bad mood.

For me, I like to see the small gestures of kindness.  The extra sweet given to a child who has thanked the shop assistant on possibly their first time up to the counter with money.  I also admire people who offer me suggestions, so if I go to a cafe and ask 'what do you recommend?' I love to hear their choices and sometimes if I am very lucky, I get to hear why the carrot cake is important to them.

Of course, some helpers have to perform their benevolent acts all of the time.  There is probably nothing more tiring than the work of doctors, nurses and also too widely forgotten, the relatives of seriously ill people, who as home carers have to dedicate twenty four hours to the sustenance and cleanliness of their loved ones.  How do you help people the whole time when sometimes they resist the routines and gestures that will provide comfort.  Who cares for the carers?

I hope that sometimes I help people even when I feel lost and occasionally a single smile can illuminate a path that was previously hidden.  We can choose to help or we can choose to hinder. Take your pick, both choices will change you.

                                                                                       Barry Watt - 29th November 2015.

'The Lobster' - Living and Loving in a World of Conformity and Ideology.

'The Lobster' is a love story for a world that no longer values intimacy and compassion.  Relationships are a necessary evil, exercises in power and role play.  Therefore, it's quite surprising that t-shirts aren't assigned at birth, labelled either 'Dominant' or 'Submissive'.

Singleness is viewed as deviant and something to be discouraged.  The simple fact that within the film single people are given a time period to find their 'significant other', prior to being turned into a creature of their choice if they are unsuccessful, underlines how society views those who have not successfully coupled up.  The world portrayed within this film is not a million miles from western civilisation today, where loners are perceived as threats or simply weird.

David (played by Colin Farrell) like many others before him arrives at a hotel.  This hotel is full of single people and also most tellingly, successful people who have coupled up as a result of the rituals and practises performed within the hotel (the successful couples are seated separately from the singles during meal times).  David has a dog with him who was formerly his brother.  The implication being that David's family has a history of bad luck surrounding relationships.  David's previous relationship appears to have gone wrong, hence his need to be at the hotel.

The hotel offers its residents every available method at its disposal to help find the 'ideal' partner.  Its methods are not about love at first sight but about proving yourself and demonstrating your strengths and if necessary, weaknesses to lure in your future partner.  The single people spent most of their time with one arm fastened behind their back, reminding them that symbolically and physically that coupling makes life easier.  They are also given talks and demonstrations exploring how being alone is essentially a dangerous act.  In one particularly funny scene, a man sits alone on a stage mimicking eating and begins to choke.  He subsequently suffocates.  The scene is repeated with a significant other who spots that he is choking and performs the Heimlich manoeuvre on him, saving his life.

The hotel also dissuades masturbation.  Historically, this is not unusual.  Some religions actively punish people who choose to masturbate.  Playing with yourself is considered an evil act.  But viewed from other perspectives, it serves to release a build up of stresses and tensions, which are not solely sexual.  From a psychological and physiological perspective, it helps to generate chemicals within the brain that enhance feelings of well being.  On the other hand, within the film, a member of the hotel staff arrives when the male guest is in bed and effectively stimulates the guest to ascertain how quickly they are aroused (it is not shown whether female guests receive the same treatment).  Tellingly, the act of arousal is stopped at the point of erection, prior to the guest ejaculating.  Ejaculation seemingly being a sinful act outside of coupledom or a waste of perfectly serviceable seed.

On a regular basis, the hotel provides social activities to allow for the single guests to become acquainted.  The dance with introverted wallflowers looking on as braver people invite others to slowly rotate and move, assessing another's worth through quiet conversation as the music plays on.  The hotel management singing, not so much 'Big Brother is watching you' as the hotel is doing everything it can to help you in these desperate times.  The semi-regular hunts, where the guests are sent out with their tranquiliser guns to neutralise the loners who appear to be escapees from the hotel, also offer the reward of companionship and extra days as a human being if you shoot the loners.

Without giving to much more away concerning the characters, if the guests are successful in coupling, they are rewarded for their efforts and sent away to yachts for a couple of weeks to help to strengthen their relationships.  If problems occur, the hotel with intervene providing children if necessary to refocus the relationship away from any problems of compatibility.  This seems to be the director's and writers' rather cynical view of society and the role of families as a means of engendering conformity.  If the relationships are successful, the couples are allowed to leave the hotel and go to the city.  Their future as animals, fish or fowl etc frustrated.

The alternative lifestyle offered by this film is life as a loner.  David leaves the hotel and ends up in the woods.  The single lifestyle is just as regimented and ordered as life in the hotel.  Masturbation is actively encouraged, but not relationships.  If the hotel is representative of conformity through coupledom, life in the woods is about subversion through independent acts and abstinence from sexual relationships.  The semi regular silent discos with the dancers showing off their moves whilst listening to portable CD players are equally as horrific as the hotel's courtship dances.  Both are reinforcing ideologies of conformity.  In the woods, relationships are punished, although conversation is encourages so long as it is not flirtatious.

Of course, as a love story something has to disrupt these tight and unyielding ideologies.  The Short Sighted Woman (played by Rachel Weisz) provides the catalyst.  After all, you can attempt to suppress individualism but you cannot always repress the urge for individual change.  The Short Sighted Woman and David become attracted to one another.  She requires trophies of love, rabbits that she can cook.  As their love deepens, they develop a unique form of communication, requiring intricate bodily gesticulations suggesting needs and requests.

The Short Sighted Woman's eventual fate for transgressing the loners' belief systems is blinding.  By removing the 'windows to the soul', your dependency upon those around you grows.

The film has an unexpected ending I refuse to give away but seeing is believing and not seeing may well allow for love to blossom (or not as the case may be).

'The Lobster' is the antidote to the myth that loves conquers all.  It doesn't.  It is a social construct that may or may not flourish or tarnish your life from time to time.  Putting a time limit on the courtship process is no more or less insidious than pushing the notion that the only way to be happy in western civilisation is as a couple.

Unless it means something real and is not mediated through social media or online dating sites, give me solitude and singleness over vacant admiration.

                                                                                  Barry Watt - 1st November 2015.

Afterword.

'The Lobster' is a brilliant film that I could have written about for days but in writing about it, you run the risk of giving away too many plot points and characters.  Hopefully, this just gives you a way in if you are interested in seeing the film.  The film was directed by Yorgos Lanthimos (who also directed the film 'Dogtooth', another brilliant film touching on similar themes to this film).  The film has a website, if you are interested:

http://www.lobsterfilm.co.uk

'Big brother is watching you' is a line borrowed by me from 'Nineteen Eighty Four' by George Orwell, as it still successfully evokes a world increasingly becoming used to being perpetually watched or else watching.  The novel is published by Penguin.

'The eyes are the window of the soul' seems to have no obvious derivation, having been used by just about everyone.  Still, very true.  Also why some people choose to wear dark glasses I guess.

                                                                                                                                   BW.

The Price of Theatre.

The other night I went to see 'The Elephant Man' at the Theatre Royal Haymarket.  My ticket cost sixty one pounds (plus a booking fee) and upon arrival at the theatre, I decided to buy the album sized programme, which cost ten pounds.  So basically, this one trip to the theatre cost somewhere in the region of seventy five pounds.  There were cheaper seats available but these promised restricted and limited view of the stage.  Now in February 2015, I saw the Fourth Monkey Ensemble version of 'Elephant Man' at the Brockley Jack Theatre and the tickets were no more than fifteen pounds.  Their production was also more memorable than the much hyped vehicle for Bradley Cooper's theatre work, which was not bad but simply not worth the money.

Now I have had a number of conversations with friends and family where they have commented on how expensive theatre has become.  I have also read a number of articles in newspapers over the years, particularly in regards to booking fees.  I am reaching a point where I think it's necessary for people to become more vocal about this situation or at least to start to dissuade people from falling for the more painful theatre prices.

Let's start with 'premium seats'.  Now these are a relatively new phenomenon and mainly associated with West End theatres.  There seems to be a direct correlation between their creation and the tendency of theatres to encourage leading Hollywood actors to perform in their shows, in order to get 'bums on seats' to use the archaic yet never more relevant phrase.  Now these seats tend to offer you a programme and a drink (sometimes, they have to be bought in multiples of two and the programme is one between two).  The seats on offer as 'premium seats' are quite often the centre stalls.  Indeed, the 'premium seats' seem to be occupying a larger percentage of the stalls and occasionally, dress circle than the regularly priced seats.  These seats tend to be ten pounds or more than the regularly higher priced stall seats.  In fact, they can be even more than this, depending on the show.  I remember the premium tickets for Kevin Spacey's swansong for 'Clarence Darrow' at the Old Vic being out of the price range of anyone outside of theatre goers who only see one show a year or bankers!

Another bugbear are the theatres that choose to alter their pricing between seats.  The same row of seats can be priced at different amounts, supposedly due to the possibility of restricted view.  This has led to some quite funny moments when out with friends where each of us has paid a different amount for seats in the same row.  Just to add that the tickets have all been bought from the theatre, not from a ticket agency.  Now if the seat were behind a pillar, I could understand that but then the theatres shouldn't be selling the seats behind the pillars.  You wouldn't buy a pack of four doughnuts and accept three, would you?

As I briefly mentioned above, tickets purchased from ticket agencies are a similarly interesting experience.  Clearly these days a lot of tickets are presold to ticket agencies or at least, allocated to them.  This can regularly lead to supposedly 'sold out' performances having small sections of empty chairs scattered throughout.  Of course, these can be filled if people want to shift in the interval (once they realise the seats are empty).  The seats offered to the ticket agencies again tend to be the better seats in the stalls and dress circle.  They also charge more for the tickets, thanks to the booking fees and other sundry charges.  The worrying fact is some theatres now seem to solely use ticket agencies to sell their tickets, so even when you buy the tickets from the theatre box office, you are buying from a ticket agency.

This has been quite a negative piece so far, so have any theatres come up with any ideas to reduce ticket prices?  Well, surprisingly yes (ish).  The National Theatre offers cheaper Travelex £15 tickets to all of their major productions.  But there is a catch, the majority of the these tickets are sold to the Members when they go on sale.  Actually, this isn't such as bad thing as it at least means that they are being sold to people who are genuinely interested in the work that is being produced by the theatre as the tiered membership costs different amounts of money.  Also the Barbican offers a percentage off of ticket prices for members (but again, there is a limited allocation of tickets per performance, so there is a degree of urgency when it comes to purchasing tickets).  Another useful technique is to purchase tickets for the preview performances of shows.  This applies to a large number of theatres.

In closing, I would also suggest supporting smaller theatres and the Fringe theatre.  There are loads of wonderful new shows at the Soho Theatre and the Arcola Theatre in London.  Experiment with the theatres that are around you.  There are so many gems around and bear in mind that lots of the major theatre companies preview their works in smaller theatres before transferring them.  Celebrate theatre and don't let it die, as a result of governments who are either disinterested in supporting the arts or even worse, crack down upon it as a means of suppressing potentially revolutionary ideas!

                                                                                       Barry Watt - 16th August 2015.

Afterword.

All of the above theatres and theatre companies have websites and I recommend them all, although I have some objections to ticket pricing as you can see.

Travelex is a trading company who primarily deal in travel money.  Their website is:

www.travelex.co.uk

'The Elephant Man' and 'Clarence Darrow' are copyright to their respective owners and the playwrights who created them.

                                                                                                                                  BW

The Ill Fitting Suit - Depression, Mental Health and Walking Away From Broken Mirrors.

This week has been cathartic for me.  The productions I have seen have in some respects encouraged me to open up a bit publicly, not with the intention of totally exposing myself but just enough to further the message that suffering from mental illness in whatever form is not something to hide away from and that talking about it can make things better or at least, open new doors.

'Silent' currently at the Soho Theatre explores the life of a homeless man whose brother eventually committed suicide after a few unsuccessful attempts.  The repercussions of this on his brother and his life informs the momentum of this highly successful one man show.  The play served to remind me that events happen of which we have little or no control and at times, you can't help another person even someone you deeply care about.  Sometimes, you are just too close.

On the other hand, this evening I saw 'Fake It 'Til You Make It' at the Purcell Room in the Queen Elizabeth Hall.  This is Bryony Kimmings' and Tim Grayburn's new production, which explores Tim Grayburn's clinical depression and Bryony Kimmings' responses to his mental illness as their relationship blossomed.  Through song, recordings of Tim and Bryony discussing Tim's illness and through movement, Tim's life is fully and gently exposed.  The creative decision for Tim to initially wear various forms of head wear including bags to conceal his face forcefully hammers home the point that men can be notoriously reticent to reveal their feelings.

I was oddly awakened when Tim revealed how he gradually became aware he was clinically depressed when he found himself feeling down quite a lot and also crying.  As a man within most Western societies, tears are seen as a weakness.  Well, that's the patriarchal cliche anyway.  I can honestly say that in the past I have most frequently cried when things have been going very badly.  Tears have been my indication to seek help of a therapeutic nature.  I mention this only to flag up the fact that as human beings, it is vitally important to acknowledge the signs and emotional outbursts of our bodies and minds.  They can be an early warning system.

It's probably pretty obvious by now that I have had mental health problems in the past.  I have experienced 'obsessive compulsive disorders' (now renamed 'obsessive compulsive disorder'. I am sure there is some relevance to the need to change the condition from the plural to the singular.  As the so-called 'habits' or 'rituals' are multiple, the singularity seems to miss the point.  Definitions can be somewhat limiting within the field of psychoanalysis) and periods of depression.

Depression is an odd bedfellow, it can be triggered by external stressors such as relationships etc. Ultimately how it is treated varies from person to person.  Some people favour the talking cure, lasting pretty much any period of time, depending upon the severity of the depression.  This can be accompanied by anti-depressants, those less than magical elixirs that can help to make life more tolerable.  In the show tonight, Bryony recalls a message she left on Tim's phone upon discovering he was on anti-depressants, expressing her misgivings about one drug she found in his backpack that she knew could make 'zombies' out of the users.

I have been on anti-depressants at various points in my life and I will firmly back their use when I have felt very depressed but only when used in conjunction with some form of therapy.  Drug therapy without the therapist is probably not the most effective way to help someone to cope with their condition.  The only way I can describe the effect of anti-depressants on me is to state that in the past they have taken the edge off of life but conversely, that doesn't mean that bad things don't still germinate and creep up on you.  Learning to cope with life without the need for medication long term is my preferred option but I appreciate that this is not an option for everyone as mental illness takes on so many forms.

As such, it goes without saying that not all forms of therapy will be effective for everyone.  I have experienced different forms of therapy over the years.  I guess most G.P. provided therapies tend to offer humanistic approaches, predicated on the belief that the patient can ultimately find the solutions to his/her problems given the right environment and indeed, therapist.

The many other approaches to therapy have historically ranged from the horrific to the more clinical approaches.  At different periods in your life, a more or less detached therapist may prove more fruitful to the healing process.  I strongly believe that for me therapy works more effectively over short time periods if things get bad.

The brilliant thing about tonight's show was the reference to good luck dolls that Bryony used throughout the performance.  Little effigies of positivity.  They reminded me of the one inalienable fact that has always kept me going no matter how bad things have become, a sense of hope.  This comes from within, although can be helped to flourish through the positivity of others.

I think of my mental health as an ill fitting suit, sometimes I can accept its over sized sleeves and collars, but on other occasions, it smothers me.  Depression tends to lead to periods where I can't feel anything meaningful and I become more emotionally detached.

I wish to thank Bryony Kimmings, Tim Grayburn and Pat Kinevane for creating such exceptional performances.  It is only through the act of creation and revelation that mental illness can be truly accepted and the sufferer no longer stigmatised.

If this lengthy ramble accomplishes nothing else, I just want to reinforce how important it is to talk about the things that are worrying or affecting you.  If you see someone suffering, be prepared to listen if you can or at least, be there with a hug.  Life can be hard, but as human beings, we don't have to be.

                                                                          Barry Watt - 10th July 2015.

Afterword.

'Silent' is currently being performed at the Soho Theatre and stars Pat Kinevane.  It finishes on 25th July 2015.  I want to express to the playwright and performer that when he asked the audience to put up their hands if they had been on anti-depressants, I didn't put my hand up through fear but that on reflection, this blog entry was motivated by my apprehension.  Thanks for being there for the audience.

http://www.sohotheatre.com/whats-on/silent


'Fake It 'Til You Make It' is on at the Queen Elizabeth Hall from 16th July to 18th July 2015.  It will subsequently be performed at the Edinburgh Festival at various dates between 7th to 30th August.  All of my recollections of the performance are simply from memory and they are included for illustrative purposes only  Bryony Kimmings and Tim Grayburn are brave performers and I respect their work and hope that the show gains the acclaim of Bryony Kimmings' previous works.

http://www.southbankcentre.co.uk/whatson/bryony-kimmings-tim-grayburn-90753

                                                                                                                                            BW  

'The Graduate' - Jumping the Queue...

I saw 'The Graduate' awhile ago for the first time at the Barbican and it was preceded with a Skype chat with the journalist, Jon Ronson.  I found his assertion that the film and its comedy had not dated fascinating.  I would possibly suggest that this is because the film does not feel like a conventional comedy.  In fact, generically it feels more like a 'coming of age' story with some comedic moments.

The opening sequence of Dustin Hoffman's character Benjamin Braddock arriving at the airport, having graduated from university, sets the mood of the film.  There is an extended shot of Benjamin's head as he is carried along the walkway leading either to the baggage collection point or to the exit (I forget), whilst 'The Sound of Silence' dominates the soundtrack.  From the vantage point of this close-up, the viewer can see that he is preoccupied.  The fact that he is framed by the white tiled wall of the airport, starkly focuses our attention on him.

The film is as much about the insecurities of being a twenty one year old man than it is about love and sex.  It is one of the few films which successfully convey the existential turmoil that many graduates experience upon leaving university.  The awful question of 'Now what?'  I remember when I left university feeling quite overwhelmed.  Benjamin's parents, although well meaning, are really out of touch with their son's state of mind.  They throw an elaborate party for him to celebrate his homecoming.  A plethora of faces from his past mix and are anxious to see how he has changed.  Everyone has bright ideas as to in which direction, his future career path should lead.  'Plastics' being one suggestion.

In many respects, Mrs. Robinson represents escape from Benjamin's internal turmoils, a way of fast forwarding into the future.  Although, it is apparent quite early that she has had her own battles.  A history of alcoholism and a sadly distant relationship with her husband, who seems more interested in everything else than in her.  Benjamin's relationship with Mrs Robinson is depicted as awkward then passionate.  It becomes as ritualistic as any other aspect of Benjamin's life, stolen hours in motels and hotels and interestingly, almost zero conversation between them.  Their relationship is not born of love but of necessity, a way of breaking the monotony of their lives.

Tragically, Benjamin and Mrs. Robinson's daughter, Elaine end up having quite a fraught relationship.  The climax of the film involves Benjamin running off with Elaine, subsequently destroying her relationship with a man who she nearly marries and the viewer is left feeling that he will lose interest in her too.  Elaine as a character is a far more centred character than Benjamin, although her marriage to the other guy could be a 'shotgun wedding' as it is suggested that she is pregnant.  On their first date, which is positively forced on Benjamin and Elaine, he attempts to humiliate her by taking her to a strip club, possibly hoping that this will also be their last date.  There is a tragic scene in which the performer spins her nipple tassells behind Elaine's head and she is on the verge of tears.  After leading her to this state, Benjamin suddenly relents and steps in to help, by getting her out of there.

Now, in retrospect, the film continues to resonate with me for a number of reasons.  Visually, it is striking and there is a repeated water motif that becomes associated with Benjamin.  At an early point in the film, Benjamin's dad rewards him with a scuba diving suit and he is invited to wear it.  There is a beautifully memorable shot of Benjamin in the family's swimming pool, framed against the side of the swimming pool. He hates it.  Also Benjamin spends a lot of time in the swimming pool, 'drifting' as he defines it (if I recall correctly).  Water is a powerful symbolic element suggesting many things ranging from rebirth, purification but in the case of this film, it simply seems to bring to mind, the transience of existence and indeed, protection.  The pool is a place where Benjamin can hide from reality and forget.  I have also been wondering whether 'The Graduate,' like 'Easy Rider' which succeeded it, can be seen as a cultural treatise about America and the breakdown of the positivism largely associated with the 60s, as a result of such events as the Vietnam war, the death of Kennedy and indeed, the growth of post war capitalism and the 'must have' culture it helped to engender.  It certainly focuses on generational antagonisms but astutely, highlights how alienated the young generation are and how they mirror the frustrations of their parents' generation.  There are no winners in the America portrayed in this film.

The moral of 'The Graduate' could be that single life is less damaging than coupling up for the sake of social progression or the temporary relief of sexual frustrations.  Love is certainly not widely evident in this film.  A salute to single people everywhere!

                                                                    Barry Watt - 23rd May 2015.  

Afterword

Skype is copyright to Skype and is a communication application or something like that.

'The Graduate' was released in 1967 and is available on DVD from Studiocanal.  It was based on a novel by Charles Webb, which I haven't read but somehow, I feel that the experience may alter my interpretation of the film.  I will probably do so.  It is available from Penguin Modern Classics.  My use of quotations from the film may not be exact but such is the nature of memory.

'The Sound of Silence' is a song that is regularly used in the soundtrack of this film.  It was written by Paul Simon and Art Garfunkel.  It's a classic song and can be found on a number of albums including the soundtrack album to 'The Graduate' which is available on CD from Sony Music.

'Easy Rider' was released in 1969 and is one of my favourite films.  It holds up a mirror to the American dream and the reflection is not always pretty.  It's available on DVD from Sony Pictures Home Entertainment.

Jon Ronson is a journalist and writer that I greatly admire.  He explores the subjects that most people skirt away from, in an honest and humane way.  He has written a number of books including 'The Psychopath Test' which is published by Picador.

                                                                                                                              BW

Fifty Shades of Grey - How To Film 'Strong Sex' With Extreme Moderation.

I went to see 'Fifty Shades of Grey' yesterday at the Barbican and enjoyed reading the customary BBFC's certificate prior to the onset of the film, promising 'Strong Sex'.  Well, rest assured that one of those two words is oddly lacking from the film.

I read the 'Fifty Shades Trilogy' and I even blogged about the books.  In terms of the content, I felt the books offered diminishing returns as they continued.  The first book was the only one that had some promise and even had the potential to open up new lines of enquiry into different sexual practises that had previously not been explored openly in the mainstream culture.  Well, this film somewhat neuters the possibility for sexual exploration rather than nurturing such desires.

Let's cut straight to the chase...  The protagonists are filmed sans their respective penis and vagina during scenes of fairly explicit sexual practice.  Now this somewhat works against the original novel. Also more worryingly, it also fails to explore the importance of safe sex.  At only one point in the film (from what I noted) did Christian Grey tear at the sheaf of a condom.  Now bearing in mind that the guy has had at least fifteen previous partners (well, that's what he tells Anastasia) and is basically very obsessive concerning control and order, so from the logic of the film narrative that makes his character unrealistic.  He would not want to be the bearer of sexually transmitted infections.  Yes, in his own words he is 'fifty shades of fucked up', but his issues are far deeper and he certainly would not want to spend a day in a sexual health clinic with his partner, both with their fingers crossed that neither of them were infected.

The film as a whole is a fairly faithful adaptation of the first novel, discounting the representations of the sexual encounters, which I guess accounts for the furore concerning the apparent depiction of violence towards women and how at some intrinsic level, the film propagates domestic violence.  Okay, let's break down those points...  Christian Grey has a penchant for sado-masochism.  He is a self confessed dominant and is seeking a submissive.  In the past, he was abused by a woman at the age of fifteen and spent so many years as her submissive.  He has subsequently become a dominant, possibly to regain the sense of control to his life (his childhood was troubled).  Within sado-masochistic relationships that work the key concepts of intent and consent are always evident.  Hence, the use of safety words to prevent the sexual acts that one or other of the participants finds disagreeable or extreme (in this film, the word 'yellow' is the suggested word Christian offers to Ana so that she can make him aware that she does not like certain acts.  When she says 'red' he will stop anything that he is doing).  Now working within the logic of a consensual relationship, where both parties are aware of the sexual acts that they are performing and are going to perform, this does not constitute abuse of either party, providing they are both in agreement.  The assumption that is being jumped at by many people who have neither read the books, seen the film or who have failed to explore sado-masochism is the fact that Anastasia is a victim.  As the film progresses and the series of books, it becomes apparent that she is in no way a victim.  She understandably is not always aware of what is happening or going to happen but Christian effectively explains to her the nature of the relationship he wishes to have with her.  The idea of the contract is appalling but from the perspective of his character with his heavy duty psycho sexual issues and his desperate need to maintain control, it makes sense.  Having seen the film, I can categorically state that I do not feel that this film promotes domestic violence.  Sado-masochism and domestic violence are two different things.  The first involves consent, the second, uncontrolled abuse.  If you like, order and chaos respectively.

My objections with the film concern the above lack of sexual realism and also the product placement.  You leave the film with images of an LG phone on your mind and the Apple logo, which is proudly emblazoned on Christian's laptop and the laptop he buys for Anastasia.  It's odd how these are the only brands that I remembered being pushed in the film.  It's not a brilliant film but then the books are also not brilliantly constructed.  If you want to see more intelligent films about adult relationships, you could do worse than see the films, '9 Songs', 'Nymphomaniac Volumes 1 and 2' and 'Shame'.  As it stands, this is a date film for people who like their sex without emotion and their characters with little function.

Afterword.

'Fifty Shades of Grey' is out now in most cinemas and is rated 18.

The 'Fifty Shades Trilogy' were written by E.L. James.  Currently published by Arrow Books.

The BBFC (The British Board of Film Classification) are responsible for classifying all of the films we see in the cinema and other associated medias such as DVDs.

'9 Songs' is directed by Michael Winterbottom and is available on DVD.

'Nymphomaniac Volumes 1 and 2' were both directed by Lars Von Trier and are available on DVD.

'Shame' is directed by Steve McQueen and is available on DVD.

Apple and LG are both well known brands and really don't need any more publicity.

                                                                                 Barry Watt - 16th February 2015.

The Great London Literary Bench Hunt Part 3

Dear Reader, I have held you in abeyance for too long.  Now, I must recount my hunt for the remaining benches during August and September last year.

On the 8th August 2014, I hit the London Bridge and Southbank area to find as many of the benches as I could.

Great Expectations (Bench 24 - 8th August 2014)

The front of the bench depicting gaslight lit streets and towards the bottom half of the bench doomed to be sat on is the convict, Magwitch.  The bench was located not far from Borough Market.  

The back of the bench illustrates a riverside scene.

Please Look After This Bear. Thank You. (Bench 25 - 8th August 2014)

Poor Paddington Bear on his own with his beloved marmalade at Paddington Station.  This is the front of the bench that was located next to the Great Expectations bench.  I was surprised how often the benches could be found in close proximity to each other.

The back of the bench is actually quite sad.  The lone Paddington Bear sits alone sharing his food with the pigeons whilst he sees people in the distance.  How many people are honest enough to admitting to having days when they have felt this alone?

From The Gruffalo to Scarecrows: The World of Axel Scheffler and Julia Donaldson (Bench 26 - 8th August 2014)

The front of the bench which was located near to London City Hall.  The only one of the benches, which had a fence around it.  The bench includes characters from the worlds created by Axel Scheffler and Julia Donaldson.  

The back of the bench featuring such delightful elements as a loving Scarecrow couple, a goat and a pig.

The Librarian - Discworld (Bench 27 - 8th August 2014)

The front of the bench depicting a character from Terry Prachett's 'Discworld' novels.  It was located in More London (the area near the City Hall).

The back of the bench revealing the Discworld in all its glory.

Clarice Bean (Bench 28 - 8th August 2014)

This was quite a popular bench in the More London area again (as you can see from the legs behind it).  Clarice's comment is very true though, there are times when you want to start again upon finishing a good book.

The back of the bench with another of Clarice Bean's wise sayings.  I didn't know her beforehand but now I feel like an acolyte, sharing her sayings with the world.

How to Train Your Dragon (Bench 29 - 8th August 2014)

The front of the bench located in More London depicted a big blue dragon and the wild sea.

The back of the bench upon which a red dragon can be seen flying.

The World Of Dr. Seuss (Bench 30 - 8th August 2014)

This bench was located in More London.  I really liked how vibrant and colourful the bench was.  All of Dr. Seuss' most well known characters are depicted including The Cat in the Hat.

The back of the bench contains images of the book covers.  Definitely, one of my favourites of the benches.

Through The Looking Glass (Bench 31 - 8th August 2014)

This bench was also located in More London and was an absolute nightmare to photograph.  A woman had made herself very comfortable on this bench and I had to politely ask her to move, so that I could take a quick photograph and she gave me a filthy look before moving.  I felt a bit rotten because the moment she shifted everyone ran to take photos of the bench.  The utter surrealism of the novels is captured magnificently by the artist.  The bizarre chess board image mirrors a scene in one of the novels if I am not mistaken.

The back of the bench was slightly less interesting, although not easy to photograph.

Remember how I couldn't find three of the Greenwich Park benches?  Well, on my Mum's birthday, my Mum, sister and I went traipsing around the park in hunt of the little darlings.  My sister's sense of direction being far more useful than my own.

Elmer The Patchwork Elephant (Bench 32 - 23rd August 2014)

The front of the bench was covered with multiple images of linked elephants.  The only one that is different can be seen at the bottom right of the bench as it is black and white.  I suspect that this bench is a celebration of individuality as this tends to be the message perpetuated by many children's books.

The back of the bench is a patchwork of coloured squares.

The Time Machine (Bench 33 - 23rd August 2014)

The front of the bench, which was located near to the Royal Observatory in Greenwich Park.  Another bench, which required my Mum this time to politely ask the guardians of the bench to shift, so that about eight separate people could take photos of it.  Marvel at the detail of the time machine and remember how much you enjoyed reading the H.G. Wells' novel.

The back of the bench featuring all of the sophisticated equipment that you would need to travel through time.  Remember the novel was written prior to the days of the ZX 81!

We're Going On A Bear Hunt (Bench 34 - 23rd August 2015)

The front of the bench located near to a pond in Greenwich Park, which was clearly intended owing to the image on here of a bunch of kids looking down into a pond.

The back of the bench featuring a large hill and a dog in the grass at the bottom right.  This bench also required some tactful negotiation with the occupiers, so that the bench could be photographed.  

The next leg of the bench hunt took me over to the Bloomsbury area of London and around that neck of the woods on the 30th August 2015.

James Bond (Bench 35 - 30th August 2014)

This bench was located in Bloomsbury Square Gardens.  The artist has cleverly incorporated details form the James Bond novels such as the man himself drinking Martini and references to gambling.

The back of the bench plays on the voodoo elements that feature in some of the Bond novels such as 'Live and Let Die'.

The Agatha Christie BookBench. Also known as Hercule Poirot and the Greenshore Folly (Bench 36 - 30th August 2014)

This bench was located in Bloomsbury Square Gardens and incorporates elements from the novella 'Hercule Poirot and the Greenshore Folly', which was later expanded to become 'Dead Man's Folly'.  Agatha Christie filled both stories with aspects of her own life and the region where she lived.

The back of the bench and a very striking female face.  I love the use of flowers and butterflies on this bench.  This is another of my favourite benches.

"Always try to be a little kinder than is necessary" - Peter Pan (Bench 37 - 30th August 2014)

This bench was located in Red Lion Square Gardens and was the second of the Book Benches to be based upon 'Peter Pan'.  I hope that I regularly try to live by the above proverb.  Kindness is important.  Lots of elements from 'Peter Pan' appear on this bench.

The back of the bench featuring Captain Hook's ship and various underwater elements including a particularly fetching mermaid.

Pride and Prejudice (Bench 38 - 30th August 2014)

This bench was located in Queen Square Park and Garden.  The front of the bench reveals lots of elements from Jane Austin's novels.  Alternatively, it can be seen as a series of cliches surrounding the upper classes depending upon whether you like Jane Austin.

The back of the bench again containing elements from the novel.  A slightly awkward photo on account of the bench's position, which I believe may have been next to a fence.  This was one of the recurring problems with taking photos of some of the benches (they were too close to walls or fences).

Rest Your Stalks - The Day of the Triffids (Bench 39 - 30th August 2014)

The front of the bench which was located near to Senate House featuring the ever lovely Triffids and the literally blinding celestial bodies that helped to make the stupid human race their victims.

The back of the bench illustrating the Triffids and their gradual incursion into London.  A very lovely tribute to the brilliant novel, 'The Day of the Triffids' by John Wyndham.

Earnest (Bench 40 - 30th August 2014)

This very stylish and colourful bench was located in Byng Place.  Again, elements from the work that the bench was based on appear on this bench.  The front of the bench features prominent plot elements from Oscar Wilde's play, 'The Importance of Being Earnest', particularly note the child in the handbag.

The back of the bench which I believe plays on the concept of assuming various identities, in order to achieve your goals.  I love the striking and bold nature of this image.

The Curious Case of Sherlock Holmes (Bench 41 - 30th August 2014)

The front of the bench located in Woburn Square Garden.  There were works being completed the day I visited the bench.  This explains the odd angle.  Lots of Sherlock Holmes' references for you all to deduce.  Not least, the violin!  

The back of the bench seemingly picking up on keywords associated with Sherlock Holmes centred within the spines of other Sherlock Holmes' stories.

Mrs. Dalloway (Bench 42 - 30th August 2014)

The front of the bench rather austerely and delicately revealing the loves and fascinations of Mrs. Dalloway, Virginia Woolf's eponymous heroine.  I like the clock face in the background.  Time waits for no-one. 

The back of the bench which was located in Gordon Square Gardens.  For those in the know, the Woolfs lived in a property on Gordon Square from 1904 to 1907.  I initially did not think much of this bench.  It seemed too dark but it has grown on me.

1984 (Bench 43 - 30th August 2014)

The front of the bench which is quite simply stunning yet also too busy unless you are standing next to it.  'Nineteen Eighty-Four' is perfectly rendered.  It was located opposite Senate House between Malet Street and Torrington Square. 

The back of the bench which is just as busy.  Something about the style reminds me of Russian Expressionism and Cubism.  This was one of my favourite benches.  The automation and brutal order of day to day life perfectly shines through this bench.

Jeeves and Wooster (Bench 44 - 30th August 2014 (Back of bench) and 7th September 2014 (Front of bench))

The back of this bench based on P.G. Wodehouse's 'Jeeves and Wooster' stories.  The bench was located in the Brunswick Centre and needless to say, being a bench in a shopping centre around lunchtime, the possibility of getting a shot of both sides of the bench was pretty unlikely.  I managed to capture the back of the bench on 30th August 2014.  I did hang around the general area for a little while trying to capture the front of the bench but sadly, no luck on this occasion.  Jeeves serves his employer drinks, whilst he engages in a game of Croquet.

The front of the bench implying that someone can't handle his drink!  This photograph was taken on 7th September 2014.

The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe (Bench 45 - 30th August 2014)

The front of the bench depicting an event in C.S. Lewis' 'The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe'.  Narnia in all its cold beauty.

The back of the bench with a stunning representation of Aslan the Lion.  The bench was located in St George's Gardens.

The World's Biggest Flipbook (Bench 46 - 30th August 2014)

The front of the bench finally photographed on the 30th August 2014.  This bench was located underneath an escalator in Waterloo Station.  Another nightmarish bench to photograph.  People do like to sit!  The characters on the bench are the products of the imagination of Jeremy Banks, a cartoonist.

The back of the bench with some particularly charged graffiti including 'improved literacy'.  This bench is all about encouraging reading, as a means of progressing out of the sludge of everyday existence.  Notice all of the cartoon images of rubbish and the pigeons feeding on the waste of our consumer culture.

War Horse (Bench 47 - 31st August 2014)

The front of the bench containing elements from 'War Horse'.  The poppies are a particularly touching feature of the bench, which was located in More London Place (off of Tooley Street).

The back of the bench featuring the aftermath of war.

Around The World In Eighty Days (Bench 48 - 31st August 2014)

One of the very hidden benches.  This was located in Stanfords, the Travel bookshop in Long Acre.  Rather incongruously, it includes the London Eye, which wasn't featured in Jules Verne's classic.  Although, it's nice to see how the methods of transport used by Fogg and his companion are used on this bench.  See if you can spot the elephant.

The back of the bench effectively giving the plot of the novel in the style of a newspaper article.

Neverwhere (Bench 49 - 7th September 2014)

This bench was the very secret bench.  It was the last one added.  It was located in the Guardian Towers, next door to King's Place.  Unfortunately, when I visited the bench was right against the wall, so you could not see the back illustration.  As such, you can only see the front of the bench featuring characters from 'Neverwhere' by Neil Gaiman in my photograph.  You can see the back of the bench on various websites 

including http://www.theguardian.com/books/booksblog/gallery/2014/sep/12/neverwhere-book-bench-come-see-it-at-the-guardian.

Katie in London (Bench 50 - 7th September 2014)

The back of the bench located near to the Tower of London.  Although, this bench had a lot of activity.  It's interesting that people were content just to sit quickly then move on.  This of course was not the case with some of the other benches.  It's intriguing how some areas feel more conducive to sitting than others.  Anyhow, elements from 'Katie in London' by James Mayhew.

The front of the bench containing lots of London landmarks etc and an excited couple of kids riding a lion with a Union Flag.  

Noughts and Crosses (Bench 51 - 7th September 2014)

The front of the bench depicting elements from a series of books by Malorie Blackman set in a dystopian future.  The Noughts and Crosses being two disparate groups.

The back of the bench which was located in Fen Court.  Love in the shadows of chaos.  This was the last bench I photographed and I felt a certain sense of sadness as I walked away aware that I had finally accomplished what I had set out to do.

Afterword.

The benches and the characters, environments and ideas they represent are copyright to their respective artists and also to the authors upon whose works, most of the benches are based,

For more information on the auction that took place once the benches were removed and the prices that they gained at auction at the Southbank Centre on 7th October 2014, please see the following link:

http://www.booksabouttown.org.uk/?action=ViewPage&Id=9

The Guardian website link is of course, copyright to The Guardian.

                                                                            Barry Watt - 15th February 2015.